Path: senator-bedfellow.mit.edu!bloom-beacon.mit.edu!newsswitch.lcs.mit.edu!newspump.monmouth.com!newspeer.monmouth.com!newsgate.cistron.nl!xs4all!news2.euro.net!newsfeed.freenet.de!fu-berlin.de!uni-berlin.de!individual.net!not-for-mail From: "erith romycin" Newsgroups: alt.gothic Subject: alt.gothic FAQ v.4.0.4 "finding a sickness you like" Date: Thu, 4 Sep 2008 05:19:07 +0100 Lines: 129 Message-ID: <6i97lhFpceebU4@mid.individual.net> X-Trace: individual.net XkdWJdbhiKhA/kWt+DMc/wz4R+aGTXgdeqr6rvNRVRJYNywjYO Cancel-Lock: sha1:I557V0Kxam/QcET0a9ceyMec3oE= X-Priority: 3 X-MSMail-Priority: Normal X-Newsreader: Microsoft Outlook Express 6.00.2900.3138 X-MimeOLE: Produced By Microsoft MimeOLE V6.00.2900.3198 X-RFC2646: Format=Flowed; Original Xref: senator-bedfellow.mit.edu alt.gothic:886540 alt.gothic new? READ THIS FIRST draft version 4.0.4 "finding a sickness you like" Changes since 4.0.3 - added net.goth definition - added news reading advice - added welcome 000. Q: Is there a welcome message for alt.gothic? A: Yes. 00a: Q: Aren't you meant to be open and welcoming? A: What are you? New? 00b Q: ... A: Oh. Um, try not to die in a fire. 001. Q: This FAQ seems incomplete! Is anyone working on updating the FAQ? A: Kest is. 01a Q: What about questions that aren't in this FAQ? A: I. http://www.darkwave.org.uk/faq/ag/ II. http://groups.google.co.uk/group/alt.gothic/msg/6590b21704f326d6 III.http://www.altgothic.com/wiki IV. Ask. the essence of an FAQ is the AQ, eh? 01b. Q: Can I help write the FAQ? A: Yes. Talk to Kest. 01c. Q: Didn't this FAQ have a different title last month? A: Yes. Yes it did. 002. Q: What is goth? A: A post-punk movement. 001. Q: This FAQ seems incomplete! Is anyone working on updating the FAQ? A: Kest is. 01a Q: What about questions that aren't in this FAQ? A: I. http://www.darkwave.org.uk/faq/ag/ II. http://groups.google.co.uk/group/alt.gothic/msg/6590b21704f326d6 III.http://www.altgothic.com/wiki IV. ask. the essence of an FAQ is the AQ, eh? 01b. Q: Can I help write the FAQ? A: Yes. 01c. Q: This FAQ doesn't match others I've found online! Why? A: It isn't the same one. 01d: Q: Are you always so curt? A: No. Sometimes I'm Matthew Broderick. 002. Q: What is goth? A: A post-punk movement. 02a. Q: What is gothic? A: It's a little arch: Crude, architechural, musical, barbaric, literary. 02b. Q: What is a net.goth? A: A poster to alt.gothic, or another newsgroup within the *.gothic.* hierarchy. Those JUSTIFIED by an alt.gothic.INQUISITOR. 2bi. Q: An alt.gothic.INQUISITOR? A: Blessed are the words of RFC 1036: "The USENET standard is more restrictive than the general Internet Standard" 003. Q: Is X goth? A: It might be. 03a Q: Is Y gothic? A: It might not be. 03b. Q: Is emo goth? A: No. There are some stylistic similarities, but the two are distinct. Emo could be argued as a successor to goth, but history and common sense say otherwise. 3bi. Q: What is emo then? A: "Goth minus the fucking" / emo is to goth as 14 is to 24 04a. A: It's a SCIENTIFIC FACT. Q: Crabs? That doesn't seem... 004. A: It disrupts the natural order of conversation, and it causes crabs. Q: Why can't I top-post? 005 Q: Are there any other SCIENTIFIC FACTS? A: Yes. I. Top-posting causes crabs. - See 004. II. Excessive quoting makes you look like a campus socialist. - Trim posts you respond to. Leave enough for context. III. Missing attribution is like blackout sex. - What came from where? IV. Posting binaries causes giant crabs. - GIANT CRABS. V. HTML posts cause crabs that won't display in some pubic hair. VI. Cross-posting causes lobsters. VII. The Golden Age is a myth. [8]. Wikipedia is a crab holding a message in a bottle - It's easily broken, usually wet, and it smells a little fishy XIX. Sexbat 006. Q: Why are people flaming/ignoring me? A: They felt like it. 06a. Q: What do I have to do to get taken seriously around here? A: Don't ask that question, for a start. Other than that, post well. 06b. Q: Aren't new posters entitled to a little respect? A: See 000. 007. Q: [Redacted] A: [Excised] 07e Q: What's that about? A: [Classified] 07f Q: Do you have any other posting advice? A: Posting through http://groups.google.com will work, but you may be better served by a proper newsreader and newsfeed. Most ISPs provide news servers, or used to. There are a variety of free newsreaders available for download too. Recommendations from interested parties will be tabulated here. 07g Q: What is the c*b*l? A: There is no c*b*l. There are, however, a number of * chambers. 07h Q: No, seriously. What is the c*b*l? A: The c*b*l are not alt.gothic's secret masters. That's the c*b*l. 008. Q: I have something really funny to say to this troll, can I? A: Yes. We can't stop you. Some situations cannot be solved by jokes. See your local multiplex for examples. If you can resist, do. 009. Q: Do you have any other advice for me then? A: Lurk. Introduce yourself at some point, it seems to be popular. It might seem fussy, but alt.gothic abides by Scientific Facts. They make conversation easier. The essence is clarity: A post should stand on its own two feet. Buckle up. Wear nice boots. 010. Q: Nice boots? A: The traditional response is "Wanna fuck?" -- erith - SCIENTIFIC FAQtologist